Crazy songs stuck in my head over the past 24 hours

Some know me to have a mind capable of evoking idiosyncratic, cloying, and often just downright awful music without warning. The past few days have been particularly rife with bad music. Here they are, in [reverse chronological] order:

Some horrible song by the hair band "Fastway."
"I've got a brand new pair of roller skates," by Melanie Safka (I had to look that one up);
"Woman" by John Lennon, off of Double Fantasy (a gawdawful album if there ever was one)
"Silly Love Songs," By Paul McCartney (hmm, I'm noticing a theme of bad music composed by Beatles well past their prime. At least Lennon had enough grace to get murdered before he could really fall off the deep end of creative blight).
"Theme from Magnum PI"
"Sweet Gypsy Rose," by Tony Orlando and Dawn.

A lesser man would die from such thoughts.

Movies I want to see

Goodbye, Solo (Life of a Senegalese cab driver in NC)
Wendy and Lucy (Woman and her dog lost in Oregon, en route to Alaska)
Cold Souls (Woody-Allenesque Giamatti vehicle. That's good enough for me right there)
Shall we Kiss? (lighthearted french romantic comedy)
The Education of Charlie Banks (coming-of-age film, directed by Limp Bizkit's Fred Durst)
I love you Man
Monsters vs. Aliens
Tokyo Sonata (Willie Loman-esque study of Japanese corporate culture, from what I can tell. . .)

New suicide haiku

The riot of life
Is a mere outlier from
Equilibrium

New Haiku

First came the ascent.
The fall was not far behind.
I embrace them both.

New suicide haiku

I am not afraid
Because I have played this hand
As far as it goes

New suicide haiku

I don't know that I
Understand what happy is,
But it isn't this.